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Options 584 to 594

584. Call your boss a dirty crab
585. Be able to belch the national anthem
586. Be a centaur
587. Fight 50 hamster-sized hippos
588. Become a unicorn
589. All air and atmosphere above the oceans is teleported away and evenly distributed across the rest of the world. Whatever force caused this immediately releases the air to behave normally.
590. Accidentally destroy every garden gnome you see, no matter how much you try to avoid it
591. You switch genders whenever you're splashed with cold water, changing back only when splashed with warm water
592. Your name be an unpronounceable symbol
593. Be one of the minor characters in Zelda

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