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  1. Every time you sneeze you shrink by 0.1% of your current height.
  2. Have to commute to work (1/2 hour one way) by swimming through chilly water 5 days a week
  3. Have a donkey's ears
  4. Have to brush your teeth every 20 minutes (for at least one minute) for the rest of your life (not counting sleep time)
  5. Suddenly become deathly allergic to your top 5 favourite animals
  6. You can't go anywhere that has a solid barrier between you and the sky directly above you (ie, any sort of ceiling).
  7. Wherever you go, all books within 10 meters of you disintegrate
  8. Have a prehensile elephant-like trunk
  9. Live on the streets
  10. When you die your mind/spirit/soul ceases to exist


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