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Options 504 to 514
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Watch every single episode of "The Simpsons" back to back
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Eat everything with a knife and fork from now on
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Have a coconut carried by an African swallow (which is non-migratory)
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Become a vampire
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Whenever you laugh (for any reason) it sounds like an evil villain's "Mwhahahahaha!"
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Everything within ten meters of you is unaffected by gravity (or by large-scale centrifugal forces, so you don't fly off into space due to Earth's rotation). You suffer no long-term medical problems from this.
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Give five bucks to someone to stop them from constantly asking you for five bucks
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Whenever a person is stuck in traffic for more than 2 minutes they turn into a dog. When the traffic in front of them clears so they can move again they transform back into a human.
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Have lots of friends and be generally happy, but dirt poor
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Have people think you are silly