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Options 1645 to 1655
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Toilet paper feels like sandpaper
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Wake up one morning and everyone talks like Jar-Jar Binks as if its normal and how everyone has always talked. The only person who seems to remember normal English is you.
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Be the shortest person on earth
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Have perpetually dry lips that no amount of lip balm will help
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Have the guts of a boiling hot pizza pop squirted into each of your ears
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Have a comically oversized shampoo bottle for a leg
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Be only able to see out of eyes on the back of your head
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Wet yourself every time someone says the word "chair"
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Have diced habernero peppers rubbed in your eyes
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Fall desperately in love with someone who can't stand you