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Become an anthropomorphic cat. Everyone recognizes that you're intelligent and humanoid and can speak, but you nevertheless have the social and legal status of a regular cat.

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You are either on the computer or perhaps looking at a paper document. In any case, as you start to read it, you realize that is is quite long, and takes a significant mental investment to read. It is essentially a wall of text. More than you can read with a single thought. It takes several seconds to read through.

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